We all have moments when we feel bad about ourselves. But if you're struggling with a trauma history and PTSD, depression or anxiety, the way you feel about yourself in the face of disappointments, simple mistakes or to a traumatic event can spiral into shame and self loathing, self-blame, or self contempt. You might find yourself thinking nasty, harsh, abusive things about yourself---things you'd never say to a friend or someone you care about. These thoughts and feelings can take over, and leave little space for self compassion at the very moment when you most need it the most, doing damage your sense of self.
A recent piece in the New York Times, "Why You Should Stop Being So Hard On Yourself" points out that certain types of self-criticism "can have measurably destructive effects, including symptoms of depression, anxiety, substance abuse, negative self-image and, in a particularly vicious twist, decreased motivation and productivity, according to a study published in the Journal of Psychotherapy Integration. Another study, published in Personality and Social Psychology Bulletin, found that self-criticism leads people to becoming preoccupied with failure."
As with any relationship, your relationship with yourself needs to be tended to, especially when things get rough. The way you talk to yourself matters, so if you're curious about how to develop some self compassion, check out the full article here: